Star Wars Episode III - ROTS

WARNING: SPOILERS BELOW ---

I was priviledged to see an advance screening of Star Wars III on Monday.

I refrained from commenting until the movie officially opened so people could make up their own minds. This isn't a formal review, just my humble thoughts on the movie.

Revenge of the Sith was too similar to Attack of the Clones. Better than Episode I, but far worse than any of the original trilogy.

What I found so depressing was that, while Episode I and II may have been so-so, there was always a chance that George would get the magic back for part III, the movie with the most dramatic potential.

Well, part III has come and gone. It's done. There will never be another star wars movie. EVER. This was as good as it is ever going to get (barring infinite special editions and redux versions from Lucas in the coming years).

Every single scene with Padme and Anakin was painfully bad. Painfully...bad.

And Anakin all sliced up and burnt didn't floor me, remember - when we saw STAR WARS as kids we saw the charred corpses of Luke's foster parents.

Sure, there were lots of light saber fights. Good, right ? I don't know. The new light saber fights were so complicated and flashy that I couldn't really tell what was going on. That took some of the fun out it...these light saber fights weren't as accessible as the originals.

Try recreating THESE fight scenes with a couple friends and some cardboard tubes.

People say that the original trilogy was just as cheezy and over merchandised. Maybe I'm too nostalgiac.

But consider this: We don't remember the original trilogy through the fog of time. We rewatch them constantly. They hold up. They are classics, with a mythic story independant of any one era.

These movies, with their clumsy plots of trade embargoes and speeches about democracy will seem incredibly dated to the Bush Administration.

And why did General Grievous sound so much like Triumph, the insult comic dog ?

"Yyyeeeessss.... Count Dookoo taught me your Jedi arts.... FOR ME TO POOP ON !".

UPDATE:

Perhaps the most damning testimony in this whole debacle comes from Lucas himself.

According to George Lucas' interview in Entertainment Weekly :
(paraphrased)
Lucas: "When I was creating the first 3 movies, I knew I had to have some backstory, so I brainstormed about 90 minutes worth of material. It was all character study and political expose, which I realize isn't the most thrilling cinema.

For the prequels, I knew I wanted to leave all the good stuff for the 3rd, climactic episode. I put 20% in Episode I, another 20% of the story in Episode II, and the remaining 60% of the backstory in Episode III.

Unfortunately, Episode III ran way too long, so I cut out everything that wasn't all about Anakin. "

Right.

So, if I understood the man correctly:

EPISODE I: THE PHANTOM MENACE - 80% Filler (Jar Jar, Pod Race, Gungans) and 20% of a THIRTY YEAR OLD rough draft that George Lucas admits isn't very interesting as cinema.

EPISODE II: ATTACK OF THE CLONES- 80% Filler (Bad love story, wise cracking droid soldiers) and 20% of a THIRTY YEAR OLD rough draft that George Lucas admits isn't very interesting as cinema.

EPISODE III : REVENGE OF THE SITH - The remaining 60% of the story, which was ruthlessly cut down for time.

I'm sorry, but there is no way in hell any of the prequels could have been good.

Case closed.

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